Oatmeal Diet, Take 2

Ummm, my first attempt at the Oatmeal Diet was an absolute bust. It started out as planned, but quickly turned nauseating, literally. The night before, I prepared five 300 calorie servings and placed them in separate containers. I woke up at 5:30am and ate my first serving. Bland. Very, bland. I managed to get it down and left home for the gym.

At 8:55am my iPhone alarm reminded me it was time to re-heat my second serving. I was in a meeting at the time and brought the oatmeal with me. As I slowly picked and poked away at my bowl of mush I started to feel a little uneasy. The lack of flavor and the denseness of the oatmeal left me feeling like I could throw up. I had to stop eating and wait for a few minutes before another bite. I threw in the towel with about three bites left and let the other servings rot on my counter.

I called my wife and confessed that I wouldn’t be able to get through a week of eating flavorless mash. She advised me, again (as she had before I started) to add something else to jazz up the taste, and with that advice I’m going to try this again. I’m modifying my rules to allow for flavor beyond pure, plain oatmeal. Ewww.

Rule 1: Eat oatmeal with one added flavor.
Rule 2. Available flavors: peanut butter, strawberry / blueberry jelly, salt, butter, honey.
Rule 3. Drink only water, with one exception.
Rule 4. Exception to water: Gatorade (1 daily after workout).
Rule 5. Consume exactly 1,500 calories daily from oatmeal. (I’ve decided against calculating the number of calories from flavoring.) *Side note – I then changed my mind and added them too, where available. 04/01/2011, 9:23pm*
Rule 6. Eat at specific intervals: Serving 1, 5:30am; Serving 2, 9:00am; Serving 3, 12:30pm; Serving 4, 4:00pm; Serving 5, 7:30pm
Rule 7: Don’t stop before it’s over.

I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I didn’t make it all the way through my second serving, but I’m confident this time will be different. (Don’t people always say that before they undertake (usually for the second time) some unreasonable challenge? ) I feel like I have a better plan, but as before I don’t have a particularly good reason for doing this. I just want to. If all goes as planned I’ll be writing about my progress here. Please comment as you’d like and ask any questions about my sanity if you’re wondering whether or not I’m crazy.